Wednesday, December 12, 2018
8:52 am pst
It's hard to find a parking lot where the business hasn't posted a sign announcing they are not responsible,
be it for theft, vandalism, or general mayhem. Well, good for them! I think I'll do
that, too. I can put a bumper sticker on my car saying I'm not responsible for anything that might happen
while driving and texting to my friends about how drunk I am, or anything else for that matter. I could
put a sign on my house saying I'm not responsible for any accidents or violent attacks by pets or in-laws. Or
I can just put a sign on my back – or even better! a tattoo! – that says I'm not responsible
for anything. Ever. "Yes, your honour, I did run those nuns off the road,
which set the orphanage on fire, all while running from the police after robbing the Git N Gone, but see the tattoo?"
the thing, folks. Just because you say you're not responsible doesn't mean you're not. If
anything, it means you know a problem exists, which should make you even more responsible. You know that
a customer's car is probably going to be broken into before she even gets to the door, but instead of improving your security
you stick up a lousy sign. I'm sure that brings comfort to your customers. "Yeah,
my car's been stolen, but at least the store's not responsible. Boy, I wouldn't want that.
I would hate that they'd have to do anything more to ensure my safety while shopping here than to put up a lousy sign."
while we're at it, putting up a sign saying that you "reserve the right to refuse service to anyone" doesn't mean
you have that right. "Nope. We don't serve Blacks, Asians, Hispanics, Native Americans, Non-Native Americans,
Episcopalians, Libertarians, Jews, Jehovah Witnesses, anybody with an accent, Southern Europeans, Northern Europeans, or anybody
named 'Jim.' And I have that right. I got a sign that says so. And if you make a fuss, I'll shoot you.
I won't be responsible for that, either."