The Holy Grail Press
Perfectio Est Sudium Stultorum
Divergent Fox and the Seven Bunnies Buford
Once there was a very unimaginative rabbit who had seven bunnies. Since she had no imagination whatsoever, she named them all Buford. All the Bunnies Buford grew up, and as bunnies often do, they set off together to find the world.
Now it so happened that Divergent Fox and his kit, who was named Carson, were out for the day when they saw the seven Bunnies Buford’s hopping along all in a row.
“Why do you suppose it is that bunnies hop?” Divergent Fox asked Carson, for he was teaching his kit the ways of the world.
“Evolution,” answered Carson, after carefully considering the question for several moments. “Their hind legs have evolved over time so they can do stuff like that. But I haven’t the slightest idea why,” he added.
Divergent Fox smiled his approval. “Very good,” he said, “but it’s not exactly the answer I was searching for. Can you try again?"
“Oh,” said Carson. He thought and he thought and he thought. “The hopping motion,” he concluded, “allows the rabbit to flee quickly from danger while allowing him to periodically see over the tall grasses in which he frequents, thus allowing him to avoid further danger.”
Divergent Fox once again smiled his approval. “Very well thought out,” he said. "However, I had a different answer in mind. Can you try again?”
“Oh,” said Carson. And once more he thought and thought and thought. And when he was through thinking he answered, “No."
“A rabbit hops,” explained Divergent Fox, “so that it can get to where it’s going.”
“Oh,” said Carson.
“And where do you suppose those seven bunnies are going?” asked Divergent Fox.
“I don’t know,” said Carson, having not thought at all.
“They’re going to be our dinner,” Divergent Fox said with a smile that only a fox can smile.
And with that he leapt from behind the thicket where he had been hidden and grabbed the very last Buford in the row.
The Buford who had been walking in front of the last Buford turned and saw that Buford was gone, so Buford asked the other Bufords, “Where’s Buford?” And since they were all named Buford, they all answered, “Here.” And nobody noticed that the last Buford was gone.
Pretty soon Divergent Fox once again leapt from behind the thicket, and he once again grabbed the very last Buford in the row.
When the other Bufords suspected that another Buford was gone, they all asked, “Where’s Buford?” And, of course, they all answered, “Here,” and continued on their way.
This went on until there was only one Buford left. And, of course, when he was gone, there was no one left to ask, “Where’s Buford?”
No one, that is, except for Carson, who dreamily asked, “Where do you suppose it is that bunnies go when they are no more?”
Divergent Fox, who was too full to answer, burped twice, and then closed his tired eyes and quietly began to snore.