The Holy Grail Press
Proudly Made On Earth By Earthlings
Word of the Every So Often​
truthful hyperbole: (noun phrase) This is a sillyism coined by none other that Donnie Trump (or his ghost writer) in the book Art of the Deal. A truthful hyperbole is not an out and out lie. Rather, it’s an over-statement based on a partial truth that plays to what people already want to believe. For instance, Trump’s saying he’s the best president ever is a truthful hyperbole. It is true that he is a president. But the best ever? A bit subjective, to say the least. But as such, impossible to say it’s not true.
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The Almost Daily
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It's National Fill Our Staplers Day. Nope. We're not making it up. Somebody thought it fit to declare one day of the year the day for making sure your stapler is ready to go at a moment's notice. It's not the day that the patent for a stapler was issued, that was on January 24, 1866 by a guy named George McGill. Well, for a stapler that resembles what we're still using to this day. Today is not a day for anything except filling yours, and anybody else's stapler. So be sure to stock up on staples, and don't be afraid to go knocking on doors. Today is your day!
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Cartoon of the Week
STUFF
The Ballad of King Bob and His Horse Bill
This is the story of Wise King Bob
and his stead and companion Bill.
They rode not to pillage and rob.
Rode not to murder and kill.
They rode through country and county.
They rode o’er hill and dale
in search of the sacred bounty,
in search of the Holy Grail.
They traveled through wind, snow, and rain,
through mud and sleet and hail,
through locusts and plagues, untold of pain,
Chevrolet lug nuts and two-penny nails.
Through blackened night and driving sands,
blizzards and buzzards and hoary frost,
through Krsnas and Vishnus and bad rock bands,
and cold spaghetti without any sauce.
For seventeen years they traveled this way,
until finally Bill had had enough.
He sat down on the road to stay,
and said, “Boss, it’s time to get off.”
Said Bill, “My hooves are tired. My back is sore.
I’m ready to go back home.
If you want to carry on some more,
you’ll have to carry on alone.”
Good King Bob would not falter.
He continued on his quest.
So Bill laid down his halter
and returned to his home in the west.
When Bill arrived at the castle,
how the subjects did dance and sing.
Being without a king was a hassle,
so they made a horse their king.
King Bob traveled on many a year more,
‘till one day at a church rummage sale,
in a discount pile on the floor
Good King Bob found the Holy Grail.
Good King Bob, his quest complete
returned the way he came.
Bill gladly gave back the Royal Seat.
To the people it was the same.
And the Holy Grail... it came to rest
beneath a leaky window pane.
And there it does its very best
to collect the falling rain.
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