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Word of the Every So Often

marcid:  (adj.)  withered; wasted; pining away; dying; conveying a sense of decay and extreme thinness.  When you become marcid, you’re probably on your way out.

Everyday History

On September 1, 1972, Bobby Fischer defeated Russian Boris Spassky to become the first US Chess Champion.  That’s first since 1866, when the World Chess Championship first began.  Chess itself began way before that.  It started out as a game called Chaturanga, which was played in 6th century India.  Yeah, the pieces moved differently, there were no squares on the board, but the basic characters were there – infantry, calvary, elephants, and chariots that would become pawns, knights, bishops, and rooks.  Chaturanga made its way to Persia in the 7th century, where it was called Shatraj, which played a bit slower than its predecessor, had fewer pieces, and required more strategy.  From Persia the game spread to Europe around the 9th and 10th centuries, where it developed into the game we know today. 

 

So here’s the thing about chess.  It’s not that hard of a game to learn.  The kid down the street taught us how to play it in an afternoon.  And then, maybe a week later, he taught us how to really play.  Sure, it might take a bit to learn how the pieces work, but it’s really not that hard.  You could probably get the hang of it, say, in about ten games.  To get good might take 100 or so games.  To become really good 10,000.  Or, as the saying goes, “The ability to play chess is the sign of a gentleman.  The ability to play chess well is the sign of a wasted life.”

 

But then, some people are just better at it, like Bobby Fischer.  Back in 1958 Bobby was 15 years old (and five months) when he was first awarded the title of Grandmaster, the youngest person to do so at the time.  Becoming a Grandmaster requires winning a whole lot of sanctioned tournaments.  Bobby was just 29 when he won the World Championship in 1972, receiving the grand prize of $156,250, roughly the equivalent of 1.2 million today.

 

Fischer effectively retired from chess in 1975 when he refused to defend his crown against Anatoly Karpov.  Fischer wanted the Federation to change the format of the Championship, such as the amount of games played and how each game is counted, and the Federation said, “No.”  So Fischer took his board and went home. 

 

Fischer lived in seclusion until 1992, when he played a rematch against Boris Spassky in Yugoslavia, which he won, this time with a grand prize of five million.  However, at the time the US had economic sanctions against Yugoslavia, and they issued an arrest warrant for Fischer, forcing him to spend the rest of his life in exile.  Fischer died on January 17, 2008, after refusing medical treatment.  He was in Reykjavík, Iceland, where the original 1972 championship was held.

 

Cartoon of the Week

27 Grid Lions.jpg

Grid Your Lions

Stuff

Cosmic Rats:  The debate continues

 

by Earl Eldridge

 

Ever since Dr. Ivan Tupidsay announced the existence of Cosmic Rats in 1992, debate has raged throughout the scientific community over the reality of this alleged phenomenon. 

 

After an exhaustive 17 year survey of the Cosmos, Dr. Tupidsay was able to conclude, much to the shock of astronomers and astrophysicists worldwide, that there is no Cosmic Cheese (Astronomy Today, April 1992).  As his argument follows, it would take Cosmic Mice far too long to devour a hunk of Cosmic Cheese.  The Cosmic Cheese, though, has clearly been eaten, which explains why none can be found.  Therefore, there must be Cosmic Rats, since no other creature would possess such an affinity for Cosmic Cheese.  Cosmic Rats, estimated at being perhaps several light years long, are obviously very adept at hiding.

 

Professor Giuseppe Asabuncha, of the Bologna Institute of Technology in Bologna, Italy, has recently announced that Dr. Tupidsay’s research was, at best, horribly flawed.  “His survey was by no means exhaustive.  He only mapped small sections of the Universe…and then extrapolated the rest.  Even those sections he investigated were not representative of the Universe as a whole,” said Professor Asabuncha. (Cosmos Quarterly, January 1995)

 

Still not satisfied, Professor Asabuncha has begun an independently funded search for Cosmic Cheese, which he is confident will once and for all prove the fallacy of Dr. Tupidsay’s Cosmic Rat Theory.

 

Proponents of the Cosmic Rat Theory are quick to point out, however, that even if Cosmic Cheese is discovered it will only strengthen Dr. Tupidsay’s original conclusion.  “It is only logical,” Dr. Tupidsay wrote in the Cosmic Mind (Holy Grail Press, 1995), “that since there are Cosmic Rats there must, therefore, be a cosmic food source.”

 

Recently, Messerschmidt and Baum of Southern Cal have proposed a Cosmic Cat Theory to explain why they have been unable to find any Cosmic Rats. (Cosmos Quarterly, February 1995)

 

“Absolutely ridiculous!” was the response of Dr. Tupidsay.  “It is most obviously an attempt to find a simple explanation for a complex cosmic phenomenon by manufacturing the solution out of pure fiction.”  (Cosmic Mind)

Mr. Eldridge is an associate professor of Astronomy at the University of Milan.  Other articles by Mr. Eldridge have appeared in Cosmos Quarterly, Astronomy Today, and more recently Astrophysicists Digest.  He is currently finishing his doctoral thesis Stars, Planets, and Stuff Like That

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