The Holy Grail Press
Perfectio Est Sudium Stultorum

Word of the Every So Often
September 20, 2023
wit: (verb) to have knowledge of; to make clearer something you’ve already said or made reference to you. This word is a tad bit archaic; to wit, nobody really uses it much anymore, except for its past tense, which is “wist.” After all, if you are full of wist, then you are wistful.
Cartoon of the Week

Other Stuff
Dead People
All the people I’ve ever known
who have died
keep calling me on the telephone
and then hanging up.
I know it’s they
who are leaving all the messages on the answering machine,
the quiet click of the receiver
falling back into its cradle
after they’ve said nothing at all.
Sometimes they try to disguise their voices as telemarketers,
trying to sell time shares down in Florida,
but they’re not fooling me.
“Uncle Arnie, I know that’s you!”
I scream into the mouthpiece.
They usually hang up.
Sometimes they’ll page me at bars
and then speak so softly
that I can’t understand a word that they say.
But I know what they want.
They want me to follow the light,
to go down that tunnel,
to leave the shell of my body behind,
to come join them in an eternal game of cards
where nobody keeps score.
But I’m not going to do it.
Not yet.
Maybe not ever.
I know it’s just a matter of time
before they start knocking on my door,
trying to peak around the curtains,
trying to catch me hiding behind the sofa
pretending not to be home
with the TV still blaring.
Maybe I’ll send my wife
to tell them I’ve gone out for the evening.
Or maybe even better,
they won’t know the difference
and take my wife instead.